Tales From My Father: Emergency TP

by
posted on October 8, 2012
wilder_ah2015_fs.jpg

I’ve heard plenty of funny hunting stories over the years, but one of my personal favorites comes from my Dad, set a year so before I was even born and just after my parents had moved in together.

Dad was in a goose pit one winter day with a couple hunting buddies and the family golden retriever when nature called.

Not wanting to offend anyone’s olfactory sense, he excused himself from the pit, found a secluded part of the field and “took care of business,” so to speak. It was then—and only then—that he realized he didn’t bring the bag of toiletries with him. Worse, he was pretty sure it wasn’t in the pit or truck. Nothing around looked appealing, either. Uh oh. Time to improvise.

Fast forward to the next day, where my Mom was getting a load of laundry together. She picked up Dad’s hunting clothes from the day before and noticed his boxers, though intact, had the rear end cut out.

She confronted Dad, and he explained that the back half of his cotton undergarments had been cut out and used as a substitute for his toilet paper. Her next question, obviously, was why he’d taken the time to cut them up rather than just using them whole.

“What if I had to go again?”

Well argued, old man, well argued.

Latest

Mainmaxima Sable
Mainmaxima Sable

Carbon Express Introduces Maxima Sable

Designed to combine the ultimate in speed and stealth, the Carbon Express Maxima Sable RZ is constructed with Carbon Express’s exclusive TriSpine technology.

First Look: 457 Varmint Precision Chassis MTR in 22LR

On the heels of CZ’s introduction of the 457 Varmint Precision Trainer MTR comes the 457 Varmint Precision Chassis MTR in 22 Long Rifle. 

2022 Gear of the Year: FORLOH AllClima Softshell Clothing w/RECCO

FORLOH is an all-American gear company formed in 2020 with the express intent of delivering high-quality technology to the outdoor world. It stands at the cutting edge of clothing technology—and it does so with all-American-made products.

#SundayGunday: GForce Arms LVR410

Get a closer look at GForce Arms LVR410, the latest addition to our #SundayGunday series.

2022 Ammo of the Year: Winchester 6.8 Western

Any way you cut it, this cartridge is a long-range winner. It maintains its energy at distance, and it’s plenty accurate, too.

Pioneering Wild Turkey Research Underway

The National Wild Turkey Federation (NWTF) is helping fund a new wild-turkey research project conducted by Mississippi State University and the Mississippi Department of Wildlife, Fisheries and Parks.

Interests



Get the best of American Hunter delivered to your inbox.