I love hunting. I love football. My weekends from September to January are filled with both. During these months, I love life.
But there is trouble afoot in my happy little world.
In my home state of Maryland, Sunday bowhunting starts on Oct. 17 and stretches all the way until Nov. 14. My beloved Baltimore Ravens are playing on all but one of those dates. And now you see my problem. How can I pay proper attention to both?
Well, I've devised a plan. Here's how I'm going to get it done this coming Sunday:
4:30 am: Hit snooze button on alarm.
5:15 am: Stab alarm clock with Buck knife...repeatedly.
7:00 am: Wait.
8:00 am: Wait some more.
10:00 am: See a few non-shooters, begin to feel defeated.
12:35 pm: Watch the pregame show on CBS, and have a refreshing beverage with some classic American fare.
4:00 pm: Leave Ruby Tuesdays full and happy. Ravens won.
4:30 pm: Back in treestand for evening hunt.
6:00 pm: Kill this buck with a perfect double-lung shot. Rejoice.